That’s All Folks! Hillary and Joe Crack Up

Printed from: https://newbostonpost.com/2019/05/03/thats-all-folks-hillary-and-joe-crack-up/

“Many a true word is spoken in jest.”

The proverb dates back to Geoffrey Chaucer’s “The Cook’s Tale” from his Canterbury Tales. It suggests that truthfulness frequently surfaces through comedic lines. Now, if there’s anyone in America who should avoid the temptation to be humorous, it’s undoubtedly Hillary Clinton, the most unfunny person in the nation.

Still, she gave it the old college try on The Rachel Maddow Show on MSNBC, the official network of the Democrat Party, while referencing Donald Trump’s cleverly sarcastic 2016 quip:  “Russia, if you’re listening, I hope you are able to find the 30,000 emails that are missing.”

Of course, Trump was highlighting presidential candidate Clinton’s misuse of State Department emails, along with the Obama Administration’s half-hearted attempts (not) to recover them. Trump is the kind of personality that can pull it off; Clinton not so much.

Clinton is reframing the gibe for the 2020 election:  “China, if you’re listening, why don’t you get Trump’s tax returns. I’m sure our media would richly reward you.”

It would seem that second sentence about “our media” is a bit redundant. It’s a given that the Leftist media will “richly reward” anyone who helps them embarrass President Trump or a member of his family. And we already know it’s their media. What’s so funny about that?

The Clinton revision spotlights the obsession of the liberal Democrats and their mainstream media allies with rummaging through President Trump’s personal tax data. One might think that those who use “privacy” to cover everything from graphic violent pornography to gruesome late-term abortions might allow some private space for IRS tax intrusions, as well.

But, no, not in this case. The Democrats, the media, and now, quite possibly, Chinese agents are snooping into Trump’s family business, trying to access private tax returns by any means necessary.

“Why should Russia have all the fun?” asked Clinton with another would be side-splitter. Not exactly Joan Rivers or Phyllis Diller on the comedy scale. Where is Minnie Pearl, now that we need her?

Then Clinton gets down to cases:  “Since Russia is clearly backing Republicans, why don’t we ask China to back us?”

Why not, indeed.

Communist China owes the Clintons a great deal. When the Clintons were in power — and remember you were promised “two for the price of one” — China made tremendous economic and geopolitical gains. Thanks to the Clintons, the Communist giant was granted Permanent Most Favored Nation (bureaucratically euphemized to “Permanent Normal Trade Relations”) status by the United States. This has contributed immensely to the ballooning trade deficit and the loss of American workers’ manufacturing jobs. At the same time, the Clinton Most Favored Nation policy has immeasurably boosted China’s once-fragile socialist economy.

In addition, China’s place in the world was mightily enhanced by the Clintons’ supporting the totalitarian state’s admittance to the World Trade Organization. In remarks endorsing China’s big step onto the world economic stage, President Bill Clinton said, “The WTO agreement will move China in the right direction. It will advance the goals America has worked for in China for the past three decades. And of course, it will advance our own economic interests.”

Clinton added, “Bringing China into the W.T.O. doesn’t guarantee that it will choose political reform. But accelerating the progress — the process of economic change will force China to confront that choice sooner, and it will make the imperative for the right choice stronger. If China is willing to take this risk — and these leaders are very intelligent people; they know exactly what they’re doing — if they’re willing to take this risk, how can we turn our backs on the chance to take them up on it?”

Finally the 2-for-1 Chief Executive concluded, “If you believe in a future of greater prosperity for the American people, you certainly should be for this agreement.”

One supposes those predictions might be seen as humorous, if there were not so much economic carnage across the American heartland in their wake.

Yes, Mr. and Mrs. Clinton, those trade agreements certainly worked well economically for you. But not so well for folks in blue collar industrial and manufacturing jobs, those workers who were once envied by laborers throughout the rest of the world.

Now it’s time for China to return the favor. 

The Communist Chinese can offer up their own special 3-for-1. Not only can the Communists repay Bill and Hillary Clinton, but they can also boost another veteran supporter of Chinese accession to Most Favored Nation and World Trade Organization stature. Among the strong supporters of the Clinton-China economic axis was none other than Senator Joe Biden of Delaware. You know, the same Joe Biden whom big labor and big media routinely pronounce the best friend of the worker. Is it too outrageous to ask Biden and the Clintons to clarify precisely which country’s workers they were and are representing?

Right on cue, Biden hit the campaign trail in Iowa making light of the idea that Communist China presents a growing challenge or threat to the United States. “China is going to eat our lunch?” he asked incredulously. “Come on, man,” he chortled dismissively. 

Then he said, “They’re not bad folks.” Doing his best Porky Pig “that’s all folks!” emulation, he added a second, “Folks.” Perhaps it was simply an awkward Bidenish verbal embrace of Iowa’s pig farmers.

Without missing a beat, Biden delivered the most unintentionally hilarious one-liner of the entire campaign. He wondered aloud, “Guess what?” Then, as if living on another planet or in another age, he responded, “They’re not competition for us.”

That must have them rolling in the aisles in Beijing and Shanghai.   

Never one to stop, Biden opined, “They can’t even figure out how to deal with the fact that they have this great division between the China Sea and the mountains in the east.” Then came the all-important punch line: “I mean in the west.” Somehow the garrulous campaigner omitted “north” and “south.”

One thing’s for sure:  The great Henny Youngman’s place in the annals comedy history is threatened by neither Joe Biden nor Hillary Clinton.

If only America’s economic and international future was equally certain. 

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